tough week
27/03/09 21:57
One of the weird things about theft is the
unforeseen consequences that go along with it. My
truck and snowmobile were stolen from the front of
my building this week. This in itself was
devastating but pile on top of it the fact that I
was on my way to shoot for a job that I really need
to finish, and as result, I missed the best day of
the week. That's not the end of the world, but it
stings and puts me even further behind on an
increasingly huge workload.
I lost that whole day. I lost half a day dealing with ICBC and police. I have lost my ability to get to and from my work at a time when I desperately need to be mobile. But worst of all is the fact that I am mad and disheartened and I have no ability to be creative when I am angry.
I tend to portray myself as a pretty happy guy on this blog. For the most part that is true, but I am a reformed cynical punk rocker angry kid mad at the world, and that guy is lurking just below the surface at all times. When he gets out, I tend to not be very fun to be around. He was knocking on the door with a crowbar this week begging me to come out and play.
I took a few days off from blogging because I didn't want to vent here, and I'm glad I did. There have been a couple of really generous people who have offered to help and that has been a little bright spot in a dark week. I have about six weeks left in the season and I feel like I am at square one. I've been trying to be a better person in the last few years and to have this shit come down just days after raising a bunch of money for my favourite cause is one of those things that makes you scratch your head.
I lost that whole day. I lost half a day dealing with ICBC and police. I have lost my ability to get to and from my work at a time when I desperately need to be mobile. But worst of all is the fact that I am mad and disheartened and I have no ability to be creative when I am angry.
I tend to portray myself as a pretty happy guy on this blog. For the most part that is true, but I am a reformed cynical punk rocker angry kid mad at the world, and that guy is lurking just below the surface at all times. When he gets out, I tend to not be very fun to be around. He was knocking on the door with a crowbar this week begging me to come out and play.
I took a few days off from blogging because I didn't want to vent here, and I'm glad I did. There have been a couple of really generous people who have offered to help and that has been a little bright spot in a dark week. I have about six weeks left in the season and I feel like I am at square one. I've been trying to be a better person in the last few years and to have this shit come down just days after raising a bunch of money for my favourite cause is one of those things that makes you scratch your head.
Comments
The things I don't know.
18/03/09 19:19
I might as well admit right here and now that I
don't know squat about photographers. I mean, other
photographers. Well, that's not entirely true, I've
learned a lot in the last couple years, but for the
longest time I didn't know any important
photographers beyond Ansel Adams. And that was just
fine with me. I lived in a bubble and I liked it.
When my shooting started evolving from pure "action
sports" into something a little more advanced, I
wanted keep the process as untainted as possible. I
was really afraid of being overwhelmed by an
influence and becoming derivative as a result.
In the last few years I have seen young action sports photographers take unique ideas and recreate them, and pass them off as their own. I think it's totally reprehensible, but the shots are getting published, so I guess I have a higher standard for originality. There is a lack of shame about it to, as if the copyist is entitled to the concept simply because they've seen it with their own eyes. The entitled generation has an entirely different value set and it's interesting to see how they interact with the establishment. I'm sure that at some point I'll see the bigger picture, but right now I just see selfish kids who only know how to take.
One day about a year and half ago, I was showing my friend Tim Zimmerman a bunch of my older non-action sports shots as I scanned them and put them online. He said something like "whoa, Jay Maisel influence eh?" I said: "Who?"
This is exactly what I was trying to avoid, and it didn't work at all. Without ever having seen the man's work I was being compared to him, and I was pissed off. Well in a very short time I completely changed my tune. I stopped being afraid of influences and started to embrace them. Of course, I'm not interested in recreating anyone's photo, but I've gained a lot by looking at peoples' process. In fact that is what led me to finally take a workshop last spring after avoiding them for 15 years. And of course, I learned a ton. Maybe not just from Heisler, but also from some of the other people involved. Just watching other people work changes how we work. We see solutions to problems we've been having. We learn little tricks. Questions that we have are answered and inevitably we have that moment of "Ah Haaaaaa!"
During the Heisler workshop I met Jay in the flesh, his unmistakable marble mouthed commentary sharing the little bits and pieces that make up who he is. It was a brief encounter and he wouldn't be able to pick me out of a lineup, but it completed the transition out of my bubble.
Yesterday Jay shared a little bit more at Scott Kelby's excellent blog and it's worth a few minutes. In the end, I don't want to take Jay Maisel's pictures, I just want to make pictures like Jay Maisel does. The way he works suits my style perfectly. However, I fear that he is last of a breed and we're less likely to see his kind of work much from my generation. (Although I'm sure a few of the entitled kids are walking around his neighbourhood looking for his shots and trying to identically recreate them to call them their own.) I understand that there probably isn't much chance that this body of my work will ever have a showing at the VAG, but that's not the point. I am compelled to shoot like this and have to keep doing it.
Here are a couple links to things about the show this weekend. See you there:
The Pique
Boardistan
In the last few years I have seen young action sports photographers take unique ideas and recreate them, and pass them off as their own. I think it's totally reprehensible, but the shots are getting published, so I guess I have a higher standard for originality. There is a lack of shame about it to, as if the copyist is entitled to the concept simply because they've seen it with their own eyes. The entitled generation has an entirely different value set and it's interesting to see how they interact with the establishment. I'm sure that at some point I'll see the bigger picture, but right now I just see selfish kids who only know how to take.
One day about a year and half ago, I was showing my friend Tim Zimmerman a bunch of my older non-action sports shots as I scanned them and put them online. He said something like "whoa, Jay Maisel influence eh?" I said: "Who?"
This is exactly what I was trying to avoid, and it didn't work at all. Without ever having seen the man's work I was being compared to him, and I was pissed off. Well in a very short time I completely changed my tune. I stopped being afraid of influences and started to embrace them. Of course, I'm not interested in recreating anyone's photo, but I've gained a lot by looking at peoples' process. In fact that is what led me to finally take a workshop last spring after avoiding them for 15 years. And of course, I learned a ton. Maybe not just from Heisler, but also from some of the other people involved. Just watching other people work changes how we work. We see solutions to problems we've been having. We learn little tricks. Questions that we have are answered and inevitably we have that moment of "Ah Haaaaaa!"
During the Heisler workshop I met Jay in the flesh, his unmistakable marble mouthed commentary sharing the little bits and pieces that make up who he is. It was a brief encounter and he wouldn't be able to pick me out of a lineup, but it completed the transition out of my bubble.
Yesterday Jay shared a little bit more at Scott Kelby's excellent blog and it's worth a few minutes. In the end, I don't want to take Jay Maisel's pictures, I just want to make pictures like Jay Maisel does. The way he works suits my style perfectly. However, I fear that he is last of a breed and we're less likely to see his kind of work much from my generation. (Although I'm sure a few of the entitled kids are walking around his neighbourhood looking for his shots and trying to identically recreate them to call them their own.) I understand that there probably isn't much chance that this body of my work will ever have a showing at the VAG, but that's not the point. I am compelled to shoot like this and have to keep doing it.
Here are a couple links to things about the show this weekend. See you there:
The Pique
Boardistan
A portrait of a friend.
02/10/08 10:10
Today I'm posting a picture of my friend Jon. He
will inevitably hate the fact that I chose this
portrait, but everything he hates about it is why
it's going up. I don't get to shoot pictures of my
friends nearly enough, and some simply despise
having their photo taken, much like I do. Jon is
different, he loves being in front of the camera,
becomes a total ham the instant a lens is on him,
and the results are always amazing. He however,
feels like the morning after a one night stand,
with lots of hand wringing and "i can't believe I
did that". Within minutes of taking this shot, Jon
was down to his cherry red Y-front undies, and
everyone in the studio was on the floor laughing.
Jon can't make it to my wedding, we haven't seen each other in a couple years now, and I miss him like a brother. This picture makes me feel like I do when we're hanging out. I'm pretty much always smiling around Jon.
Thanks buddy.
Jon can't make it to my wedding, we haven't seen each other in a couple years now, and I miss him like a brother. This picture makes me feel like I do when we're hanging out. I'm pretty much always smiling around Jon.
Thanks buddy.
Shoes from heaven
04/07/08 16:22
Sometimes I get packages from manufacturers. This
is one of the strange and wonderful things about
being a photographer in the action sports industry.
I almost never ask for things, because I feel
really fortunate, and I don't like waste, so I
don't want to get a lot of stuff that I don't
really need in the first place. When I do, I can
always find someone who needs it, so it never goes
to waste, but still, I don't like to ask.
Nike 6.0 has been sending me stuff on a regular basis, and at this point, with the exception of my slip-on Vans, flip flops, and New Balance dog walking shoes, I pretty much rock Nike 6.0 all the time. I like almost everything they send me, with very few exceptions, but sometimes they just get it so damn right that it is like they are reading my mail. I just got another package, two hoodies, super subtle logos, in black and green. My favourite shirt colours, and then there are the shoes. Black and white and red as far as the eye can see, and hightops.
Life is so sweet. Now if I could just get all the people who owe me money to pay up, everything would be perfect.
Nike 6.0 has been sending me stuff on a regular basis, and at this point, with the exception of my slip-on Vans, flip flops, and New Balance dog walking shoes, I pretty much rock Nike 6.0 all the time. I like almost everything they send me, with very few exceptions, but sometimes they just get it so damn right that it is like they are reading my mail. I just got another package, two hoodies, super subtle logos, in black and green. My favourite shirt colours, and then there are the shoes. Black and white and red as far as the eye can see, and hightops.
Life is so sweet. Now if I could just get all the people who owe me money to pay up, everything would be perfect.
Meltdown and rebirth.
20/04/08 11:59
Sometimes
I get in so deep with all the things that need to
be done, that I stop taking pleasure in anything.
I’m literally checking things off a “to do” list
from the time I wake up until the time I go to
sleep. That’s when I usually end up exhausted, on a
couch, feeling like death warmed over and wondering
what the hell is going on.
The other day we shot a really long day, and despite the crazy weather, I managed to get some really good action, as well as some other interesting stuff. (more on that in a second)
So in this long day, I was mostly cold, didn’t eat or drink enough, and when I finally got home after midnight, couldn’t sleep. I woke up the next day feeling like I had been run over and couldn’t do anything. I just sat there, unable to find motivation for even the simplest task. So I threw in the towel and called it a recovery day. Just what the doctor ordered.
The next day I woke up and had a whole new attitude. I spent all day building, which I enjoy anyway, but I took an enormous amount of pleasure in simple things. I slowed down my life a bit, hit the reset button, and started to like doing everything.
It’s not easy to stay positive when I feel overwhelmed by work or whatever, and lately, with all the bad weather that this spring has brought, I’ve been pretty frustrated with the job part of my job. The shooting part is a welcome relief, but the work part is getting less and less rewarding. When that balance gets out of whack and there isn’t enough creative and too much office, I’m ready for a change.
Anyway, this is a long ramble that essentially says; take a day off, reassess, and try to find pleasure in the process. The exciting and rewarding parts of life can seem few and far between, so for now, I’m looking for more fulfillment in the mundane.
And now for a shot from the other night. After setting up our shoot, the fog rolled in and shut us down for a while. Walking around the lights that were set up for the film I saw my shadow projected onto the fog bank. It was pretty cool so I shot it for a while. Then I used it to do some cool portraits with Mathieu Crepel. But you’ll have to wait for those.
The other day we shot a really long day, and despite the crazy weather, I managed to get some really good action, as well as some other interesting stuff. (more on that in a second)
So in this long day, I was mostly cold, didn’t eat or drink enough, and when I finally got home after midnight, couldn’t sleep. I woke up the next day feeling like I had been run over and couldn’t do anything. I just sat there, unable to find motivation for even the simplest task. So I threw in the towel and called it a recovery day. Just what the doctor ordered.
The next day I woke up and had a whole new attitude. I spent all day building, which I enjoy anyway, but I took an enormous amount of pleasure in simple things. I slowed down my life a bit, hit the reset button, and started to like doing everything.
It’s not easy to stay positive when I feel overwhelmed by work or whatever, and lately, with all the bad weather that this spring has brought, I’ve been pretty frustrated with the job part of my job. The shooting part is a welcome relief, but the work part is getting less and less rewarding. When that balance gets out of whack and there isn’t enough creative and too much office, I’m ready for a change.
Anyway, this is a long ramble that essentially says; take a day off, reassess, and try to find pleasure in the process. The exciting and rewarding parts of life can seem few and far between, so for now, I’m looking for more fulfillment in the mundane.
And now for a shot from the other night. After setting up our shoot, the fog rolled in and shut us down for a while. Walking around the lights that were set up for the film I saw my shadow projected onto the fog bank. It was pretty cool so I shot it for a while. Then I used it to do some cool portraits with Mathieu Crepel. But you’ll have to wait for those.
Returning to Canada
18/05/07 10:41
So…
Where ya been? I haven’t seen you in awhile. Been busy? Happy? Good. Nice to hear. Me? Oh man, so much going on.
I’m moving. Oh you heard. Ya I’m moving back to Canada. No, probably not Whistler. Vancouver. Ya, I have lots of friends there and I haven’t lived there since I was a teenager, so I’m pretty excited about it. I’m loving the city these days. Vancouver is amazing.
I’m getting married too. To T. I know, it’s still really new. Well thanks, I’m stoked too. She proposed just before we drove down to California. No, she’s not here now, in Honduras. I dropped them at LAX and she took Pammy down and taught her to dive. They’re having an awesome time. They saw a frickin sawfish. How is that? I know! I would be too. She’ll be back here at the end of the month. She’s going to help me pack up my stuff.
The mag? Oh it’s doing well, that’s why I feel ok about heading home. I’m showing Crispin Cannon the ropes right now. He has a month to learn how all this works, and then he’s on his own! Ya, I’ll still shoot for FSM, I just want more outside time and less office time. Thanks. That’s nice of you to say. Well ya, we worked really hard on it. Colin is good. Finished his book. He’s shopping it around right now.
Cool, cool. Ok right on. We’ll talk to you soon then. Good to see you…
Pendygrasse snowboard photography, snowboarding photos, photographs of snowboarders, shred photographers, snowboard photographer, snow photographers, pictures of snowboarding, pictures of snowboarders, photos of snowboards, photos of snowboarding. Daniel Stephen Pendygrasse, DSP Photography.
Where ya been? I haven’t seen you in awhile. Been busy? Happy? Good. Nice to hear. Me? Oh man, so much going on.
I’m moving. Oh you heard. Ya I’m moving back to Canada. No, probably not Whistler. Vancouver. Ya, I have lots of friends there and I haven’t lived there since I was a teenager, so I’m pretty excited about it. I’m loving the city these days. Vancouver is amazing.
I’m getting married too. To T. I know, it’s still really new. Well thanks, I’m stoked too. She proposed just before we drove down to California. No, she’s not here now, in Honduras. I dropped them at LAX and she took Pammy down and taught her to dive. They’re having an awesome time. They saw a frickin sawfish. How is that? I know! I would be too. She’ll be back here at the end of the month. She’s going to help me pack up my stuff.
The mag? Oh it’s doing well, that’s why I feel ok about heading home. I’m showing Crispin Cannon the ropes right now. He has a month to learn how all this works, and then he’s on his own! Ya, I’ll still shoot for FSM, I just want more outside time and less office time. Thanks. That’s nice of you to say. Well ya, we worked really hard on it. Colin is good. Finished his book. He’s shopping it around right now.
Cool, cool. Ok right on. We’ll talk to you soon then. Good to see you…
Pendygrasse snowboard photography, snowboarding photos, photographs of snowboarders, shred photographers, snowboard photographer, snow photographers, pictures of snowboarding, pictures of snowboarders, photos of snowboards, photos of snowboarding. Daniel Stephen Pendygrasse, DSP Photography.
parking lot gold
29/01/07 10:57
Driving
home from California this past December, I stopped
in Roseville, or Rosedale or some other “Rose” town
in Southern Oregon, to meet Colin and Livi for
breakfast. It was a gloomy day and within the next
several hours I would encounter some of the
fiercest driving conditions I’d ever seen,
torrential rain of biblical proportions.
We stopped at one of those “family restaurant” type places that are everywhere out there on the interstates. As I got out of the truck, a fleck of colour on the pavement caught my eye.
Remember back in school, picture day? Remember how you would choose the package of pictures you wanted and when they came, you would cut out the wallet sized ones and write something on the back and share them with your friends. It became a big deal if you got that certain girl’s picture and if she wrote something flirty on it you would read it several times over the next week to try to distill new meaning from it. Maybe that was just me.
So I glance down to see one of those pictures, a girl, ground into the dirt and the wet of the parking lot. I didn’t think too much of it, but while we were eating it sat there in my mind and I mentioned it to Colin and Livi. I decided I would have to take a picture of the picture, so after breakfast, there I am in the rain, down in the wet dirt trying to take this picture. I wonder what the story is behind that picture. I wonder how she ended up discarded in the parking lot of some generic freeway diner.
As I was pulling away, shaking the rain out of my hair, Colin phoned my cell. “Hey man, did you take a picture of that picture?” Yup. I did.
We stopped at one of those “family restaurant” type places that are everywhere out there on the interstates. As I got out of the truck, a fleck of colour on the pavement caught my eye.
Remember back in school, picture day? Remember how you would choose the package of pictures you wanted and when they came, you would cut out the wallet sized ones and write something on the back and share them with your friends. It became a big deal if you got that certain girl’s picture and if she wrote something flirty on it you would read it several times over the next week to try to distill new meaning from it. Maybe that was just me.
So I glance down to see one of those pictures, a girl, ground into the dirt and the wet of the parking lot. I didn’t think too much of it, but while we were eating it sat there in my mind and I mentioned it to Colin and Livi. I decided I would have to take a picture of the picture, so after breakfast, there I am in the rain, down in the wet dirt trying to take this picture. I wonder what the story is behind that picture. I wonder how she ended up discarded in the parking lot of some generic freeway diner.
As I was pulling away, shaking the rain out of my hair, Colin phoned my cell. “Hey man, did you take a picture of that picture?” Yup. I did.